Got me thinking, what does a “long–term” relationship mean? … Now the definition of a committed relationship, is an “interpersonal relationship based upon a mutually agreed-upon commitment to one another involving exclusivity, trust and other agreed-upon behavior.” In this case we will be exploring Long term intra personal relationships with a variety of emotional states. The same rules apply with intra personal relationships as it does with interpersonal relationships.
If you are committed to a particular negative emotion you will constantly want that emotion to shine, you would spend time with that emotion, you would trust that emotion and you will behave in a way that is congruent with that emotion. These relationships affect your thoughts and behaviors on a subconscious level., and even if you are consciously aware that the relationship is not the best for you the commitment that you have toward the emotions makes it impossible for you to control your thoughts and behaviours. The emotion will mould and shape you like all relationships do. Emotions that people tend to go into long term relationships with is mainly one of two, either anger or depression. Yes of the all the emotions available anger and depression is by far the most popular.
The only way to change this reality is to consciously breakup with the emotion.
Breaking up means, that you break the commitment, the trust and the agreed behaviours. It is beneficial to make it a clean break and to not have contact for a little while, until you are strong enough to become friends. No emotion in its self are bad but having long term relationships with a particular negative emotion becomes a problem. Once you made the decision to breakup it is important to start looking out for potential new friendships with emotions like Love and empathy. Love and empathy will supply you with new thoughts and behaviours to replace the negative habits caused by the toxic relationship with anger and sadness.
As humans all emotions could be good and bad, depending on the context, there fore it is my opinion to allow yourself to experience all emotions, but to commit to non. Befriend the emotions and understand them that way you can always choose how to feel, what to think and how to behave…This puts you back into the driver seat of your life…
For more info on how to handle the breakup contact Mind the Change Academy today.